Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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