i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Is it penis luge time yet?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
