bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
this must be what syphilis tastes like
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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