the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize
