we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
