Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
found the other keg... it's in the tree
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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