While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
