the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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