he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
