i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
