I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
