I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
