yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
