I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
You made out with two different species that night
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
