i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone shattered a urinal.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize