your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
