On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
