when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
