i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
