The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
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