Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
