the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
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She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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