fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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