Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
