turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
