Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
