he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals