im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Randomize
