Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize