Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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