omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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