i'm signing you up for texting rehab
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
