is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Thank you for not boning my boss.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
