okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
