what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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