I bet he comes in French.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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