Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
