I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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