i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize
