Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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