just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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