1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
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