And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
the day after is always just damage control
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
