I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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