East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Randomize
