hotel room ftw
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
