Texts From Last Night

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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i cant lie to you.

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  (336): haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal? (919): i cant lie to you. http://tfl.nu/vpro
  Replies (56) Good night (868) Bad night (3022)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man

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  (215): and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man http://tfl.nu/boh9
  Replies (11) Good night (4104) Bad night (1572)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."

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  (404): My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America." http://tfl.nu/2jbp
  Replies (24) Good night (6706) Bad night (909)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun

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  (970): There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun http://tfl.nu/5s8r
  Replies (12) Good night (8679) Bad night (991)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.

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  (410): Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe. http://tfl.nu/rdse
  Replies (5) Good night (1020) Bad night (2543)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.

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  (520): Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded. http://tfl.nu/om7e
  Replies (9) Good night (3561) Bad night (1366)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  You pretty much isn't said it

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Those words don't go together.

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  (954): You pretty much isn't said it (404): Those words don't go together. http://tfl.nu/8gl1
  Replies (7) Good night (2370) Bad night (770)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.

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  (920): We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing. http://tfl.nu/xflx
  Replies (6) Good night (1050) Bad night (405)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!

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  (561): I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE! http://tfl.nu/qqyw
  Replies (6) Good night (831) Bad night (521)
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  (408): View more from California

  I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.

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  (408): I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks. http://tfl.nu/3vr5
  Replies (2) Good night (402) Bad night (296)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.

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  (407): When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night. http://tfl.nu/dw2v
  Replies (6) Good night (1115) Bad night (302)
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  (916): View more from California

  So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?

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  (916): So when this rash is gone wanna hang out? http://tfl.nu/osys
  Replies (5) Good night (297) Bad night (898)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.

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  (302): I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning. http://tfl.nu/l6mk
  Replies (2) Good night (619) Bad night (310)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too

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  (443): yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too http://tfl.nu/ly7w
  Replies (0) Good night (340) Bad night (170)
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  (315): View more from New York

  He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick

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  (315): He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick http://tfl.nu/ogpi
  Replies (5) Good night (281) Bad night (460)

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