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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.

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• (636): View more from Missouri

  Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$

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• (425): View more from Washington

  He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to

  (425): View more from Washington

  She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog

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• (407): View more from Florida

  I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.

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• (479): View more from Arkansas

  I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?

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