I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
where are my eyebrows?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
