No subtext here. People are naked.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
