well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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