we're blogging at a bar
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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