why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
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You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
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No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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